May 21, 2009

May 22, 2009 at 4:46 am 1 comment

Today is Matthew’s 3 month anniversary.  I hadn’t even realized it until Amery told me this afternoon.  I feel awful.  I hope Matthew isn’t disappointed in me.  Time is unreal to me.  I haven’t slept in 3 months.   Some days  it feels like he died yesterday, and other days it feels like forever.  And really bad days I have a hard time believing he really existed.  I hope this gets better with time.  I sure do miss him.


Entry filed under: Effexor, Infant Death, Pregnacy, Uncategorized.

Living With Guilt. 1 In 5 At Risk

1 Comment Add your own

  • 1. naturalapplemom  |  May 23, 2009 at 1:08 am

    I am very sorry for your loss. I balled my eyes out while watching the video on youtube. (I found it through, then Amy Philo’s page.) It is very sad that people have to go through this and not find out about the adverse effects until it is too late. Thanks for sharing your story and getting the word out so hopefully it won’t happen to someone else. I will pray for your family. Namaste


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  • Is not coping well at all. Loss sucks! 8 years ago
  • is scared to bond with this baby, just in case. 8 years ago
  • Happy 6 months today baby. I love you Matthew. 8 years ago
  • Living with loss, sucks. 8 years ago
  • Thinking I need to discuss plans for this baby soon or I will be having it in my doctors office. Where do I deliver? 8 years ago
Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
May 2009
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