I can not put in to words the depths of sorrow I am feeling at this moment.
We went to the doctor for a pre-natal visit yesterday, and throughout the exam could not find the baby’s heartbeat on his doppler machine. We didn’t think too much of it, but the Dr. was definitely more concerned than we were.
This morning, we went to the Ultrasound appointment, and our worst fears had been realized yet again.
Sometime in the past two weeks, our little guys heart just stopped. Don’t know why, don’t know when. I am curious if it’s still not the effexor, it has only been 4 months.
Instantaneously, any of the pain and anguish that were starting to mend, were rekindled, and then had gasoline thrown on it.
We have longed to have a living baby to bring home, and yet again robbed.
Maybe the third time will be the charm.
Have fun with Matthew, we’ll see you soon. All my love.